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April Fools: UFC Announces Buffer-Rogan, Construction of Russian Stadium

UFC President Dana White

UFC President Dana White

Even the UFC has decided to make some April Fools Day jokes, announcing today on their official website,, several major stories.

First, the UFC announced a “Special Attraction Added to UFC Fan Expo” with announcer Bruce Buffer and commentator Joe Rogan squaring off in a best-of-3 exhibition match:

As the first ever UFC Fan Expo on July 10-11 hits Las Vegas before UFC 100, fans are going to be in for a special treat with today’s announcement that a slew of exhibition matches featuring some of the Octagon’s best, past and present, will take place for viewing by all attending the event.

Particularly interesting will be a special match pitting the Voice of the Octagon, Bruce Buffer, against UFC color commentator Joe Rogan in a best two out of three matchup.

“Really, I don’t think Bruce has any business being in the Octagon with me or anyone else unless he has a mic in his hand,” said Rogan. “I’m younger, faster, stronger, and trust me, after the first match, he won’t want anymore.”

“It’s time…to begin…the beatdown,” said Buffer, a former kickboxer who promises fireworks once he gets his hands (and feet) on Rogan.

“Look,” continued Buffer. “I’m sure Joe’s jiu-jitsu is top notch, and admittedly, that’s my weak point. But when I pull the Buffer 180 on him and crack him on the chin, he’ll be the only one on the mat.”

For this special best of three matchup, the first bout will be a grappling match, the second will be strictly standup, and the third – if necessary – will take place under full mixed martial arts rules.

Of course, neither fighter believes that the series will make it to a third and deciding match.

“Oh hell no,” said Rogan. “I’m gonna put Bruce to sleep in the first one and they’ll have to wake him up for UFC 100 on Saturday night. Hopefully he’ll be well enough to speak in complete sentences by then.”

“Like Joe said, it’s not going past the first one, but the thing is, I will be the one with my hand raised,” said Buffer. “But hey, no hard feelings Joe. We’re all sportsmen here, and we can raise a glass together after UFC 100.”

Seats are still available for what may end up being the fight of the year.

Then the promotion poked fun at top-ranked heavyweight Fedor Emelianenko’s rumored demands for the UFC to build a stadium in Russia by “greenlighting construction” on the project:

UFC President Dana White today greenlighted work to begin on the construction of a new Zuffa-owned stadium in Russia that will be able to hold a number of different sporting events, including soccer, boxing, and of course, mixed martial arts.

“This is a big moment for the company and I couldn’t have picked a better day to announce this monumental event,” said White. “I can’t wait for this Stadium to be finished and we’re even including the fans in the process by holding a contest on the internet for people to choose the name of it.”

Construction is tentatively scheduled to be done in time for UFC 115 on April 1st, 2010.

“A Project like this Reaches millions In the Largest group of Fans in the sport,” said White. “Out Of all the places in the world to put up a stadium, this was the only place for us, and we’re gonna Love Seeing the UFC here.”

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